Respite in Hell
by ForensAnthro
Summary: "Please," Captain Janeway whispered. "Stay."


_November 2012_

_Author's Note: An AU during "Year of Hell" imagining Chakotay and Tom Paris return to_ Voyager_ before everything's blown up. I can't imagine seven years without any cuddling. Pretty sure the command team can't either;) _

Chakotay picked a path through the wreckage to the mess hall. He stifled winces at the gaping holes and scorched metal; there'd be a time to mourn his home, but for now, he had to take care of his people. It'd always been that way.

The ruined mess hall was a sight he'd knew forever be burned into his mind. How many funerals had he attended here, watched how many souls continue on without him into the hungry void of space? How many glasses of champagne had he'd risen in tribute to a birthday or anniversary here? How many Prixins had been celebrated here? The place was haunted with laughter long faded, tears of joy long shed. Now it was cracked and dirty and abandoned, silent as the rest of the bereft _Voyager._

The Doctor was waiting for him when he'd arrived. Whether the cold look in his eyes was Chakotay's own guilt or the Doctor was truly disappointed in his desertion, Chakotay could not tell, but either way, the hologram said nothing. He simply searched his face for a long while and then glanced over to the slender figure curled on a solitary biobed.

Chakotay had been counting the nanoseconds until he could once again return to Captain Janeway's side, but never had he imagined a reunion like this. Never had he imagined he'd evenever _see _his captain like this.

"Oh Kathryn," he breathed. Half of the dear, familiar face was warped and swollen from flames of chemical fire. Her skin was taut and shiny, and glowed an angry red in the sinister orange of the emergency lighting.

"I only had one dermal regenerator," the Doctor explained curtly. "But there's some anti-inflammatory lotion on the table." He nodded at Chakotay and then left to help somewhere else, finally content that his patient was being watched by someone who wouldn't let her escape back to the bridge.

Janeway blinked sleepily, her piercing eyes practically glowing in the smoky darkness. "You came back," she stated.

Chakotay's hand had not left the unblemished side of her face, stroking the smooth skin pale under the dark blood of her ship. "Couldn't stay away," he said weakly.

Captain Janeway made to sit up but he gently held her down. Chakotay retrieved the tiny jar of cream the Doctor had gestured to and, without breaking eye contact, gently smoothed some on to her scarred, grimy face. He himself winced to see her stifled flinches.

"I'm sorry I left," Chakotay said lowly.

Janeway's eyes shut again, and she leaned into his touch, comforting beneath the stinging of her skin. "You didn't have much of a choice in the matter," she murmured.

Now the lotion was all rubbed in, but he kept stroking her cheek anyway. Chakotay had an inexplicable desire to explain himself.

"I would have stayed with you to the end," he whispered, brushing his thumb over her cracked, swollen lips.

Her slim hand found his and clutched it. "I don't know about you, old friend," she said softly, sadly. "But in my opinion, this looks pretty damn well like the end."

Chakotay gave a pained smile, and for a moment, the two were silhouetted against the starlight, framed by the warped metal, their handclasp eternalized.

"B'Elanna needs me on the bridge," Chakotay said quietly, standing up. "You-" he added more firmly, "need to stay here and rest. You can grab the Doctor's mobile emitter, but luckily, _I _don't have an off-switch."

Janeway protested briefly but seemed too weak to put up much of a fight and settled back down on the thin mattress of the temporary bio-bed, staring at him through heavily-lidded eyes.

Chakotay himself watched her for a long time. He'd said he'd needed to go, but truthfully, B'Elanna and Harry had told him to stay with the captain for as long as he needed. Truth was, he wasn't sure how much longer he could bear it.

He was just turning to leave, albeit half-heartedly, when a cool hand grasped his own.  
"Please," she whispered, groggy in her drugged state. "Stay. Just for a few more minutes-stay."

_Always, _he wanted to tell her. _Through Hell and back. _

But her eyelids were already drooping closed, so Chakotay contented himself with lowering his form onto the biobed and taking her very carefully in his strong arms. Janeway draped herself across his chest instinctively, breathing in the comforting smell of replicated uniform and Chakotay's delicious, spicy scent. She smiled in her sleep when his lips ghosted across her forehead. The clean evanescence of starlight filtered through the windows and swept through the room like a river, washing away the hurts and scars and bathing everything in silver.

Chakotay smiled. Both were glad he stayed.

_Any reviews would be much appreciated, thanks:) _


End file.
